Laid, yea right. It’s a beautiful fall day here in our nations capitol. The sun is shining; there isn't a cloud in the sky. The landscapers were here yesterday so there would be nothing to interrupt a nice day that I was going to spend in the yard, sipping Sapphire & tonic while I waited for one of my bitches to come over.
Anyway I wake up this morning, a little later than usual, because the owner forgot to set his alarm clock. Realizing that he's going to be late, I try to wake him up. I get up on the side of the bed and tap him on the arm, and he tells me to go away, and I tell him that he's gonna be late for work. At that point he tells me he's taking the day since he is sick with the stomach flu. SHIT!!! Really, shit. His staying home all day shitting really shit fucks my plans to get some. Anyway after mom left for work, I explained the situation to him, and he was pretty cool about things. He offered me his car to go down to Alexandria, to visit my gumar. When I said that I didn't have a drivers license, he said, oh just like Brittany Spears. I tried to look annoyed with him, but in the end, he was right. I don't have a drivers license, I have an addiction problem (granted we're talking about Cinna-bones rather than crack), I don't wear underwear, but I am a dog, I am not really supposed to wear any clothes. Although I do wear my CBGB shirt that Debbie Harry gave me when I was at her last show before the place closed down.
Anyway, I think I will make the owner pay for messing up my day, but getting him to take me on walks every hour on the hour.
Sigh.
It’s a dog's life.
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