Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Its time For A Change

Well, for years, I have had a hard time getting served in restaraunts and hotel type places because I don't have opposable thumbs. Now I have reached the point where I just can't take it anymore and I have to do something about it. I know its drastic, but I think now is the time for me to go and have this revolutionary surgery. The Swedes have always been medical pioneers. I will be participating in an experimental study to help more dogs lead more human lives. I have always felt like a person trapped in a dog's body. Its difficult to get around when you can't grip a key to lock the door. And thats essential in my neighborhood, with all sorts of shady pugs around.

I just need to find a suitable donor. A few years ago, I had a deal in place with an infant from the neighborhood, to swap some teeth for a thumb, unfortunatly she started teething and that killed the deal. The one thing I am worried about, is finding a thumb with nice black fur like my own, but the Fur Club for Puppy Dogs says that its not too hard to grow new fur anyplace, so that shouldn't be too bad.

I'm not too scared, there are current 2 other dogs who who have received thumb transplants and both of them are doing well, opening doors, flipping through the pages of magazines and even participating at the upcoming Olympics in archery. I am not so sure that I want to compete in the Olympics, but it would be nice to get a drivers license or do some other cool stuff. I'd at least be able to thumb a ride to my goumar's house. I am sure there are a zillion other things I can do once I get my thumb transplant. So feel free to post here, what else I can do, once I get my new thumbs.

No comments: